Celebrate We Will, Because Life Is Short But Sweet For Certain, Hey, We Climb On Two By Two, To Be Sure These Days Continue, Things We Cannot Change

--"Two Step (live at Folsom)", Dave Matthews Band

In response to Epcot's question from the other day...

I want to first preface this by saying that the following wasn't my plan for everyone I've ever been with. This isn't my go-to plan in every situation nor a plan I've ever held as being the only plan I've ever contemplated. This idea was just the last one I ever formulated when I was still in the business of formulating ideas. It most definitely will be subject to change and will probably all be but abandoned should the situation where it was apropos ever arise again.

That being said, it would have started with me renting both a limousine and limousine driver's uniform. I don't know how much that would have cost, but one of the first criterion I had in devising these was that it shouldn't cost a pretty penny, but it should definitely be all sorts romantic and most definitely original. Limos and uniforms--I know--how romantic can that be? But I'm hoping the rest of the idea has until now has never been attempted before. I would have driven out to the airport to pick her up, probably showing up an hour or two before her plane arrived. This would have been back before 9/11 so it would have still been okay to wait at the gate for her.

At the gate I would have pulled out the second part of my plan, a flimsy cardboard sign like you've seen a million other limo drivers hold up for their prospective clients. However, instead of a name spelled out in block letters like "Richardson" or "Quinn," I would have spelled out very carefully "Will You Marry Me?" in the selfsame block letters. Arriving the hour before would have been very important for another reason. Holding up the sign that long before the actual proposal, I was hoping that it would have drawn a huge crowd to witness me popping the question. I know--doing something that intimate in front of dozens of strangers doesn't sound like me. Hell, even thinking about it now, I have my doubts I would have ever gone through with it. But my rationale would have been it's much harder to receive a negative response when you have a throng of people waiting with bated breath for a positive result. I'm not above emotional blackmail if it helps my cause.

There I would have been, waiting for her, decked out in my uniform. With any luck she would have been one of the last to debark from the plane, causing a riff of anticipation from the passengers in front of her. A buzz of excitement might have fallen over the line and she just might have been curious to find out what all the hubbub was about. Again, I was counting on that additional curiosity factoring into her overall surprise when she reached where I was waiting for her. She would have sauntered up to me and my sign, so that all this attention was focused on her, and I imagine she would have been overwhelmed. That's a good word for it. I was hoping for an overwhelmed response.

And, yes, I was hoping for a "yes" answer--as if you had to ask, Brandy.

It's kind of corny, but I thought it would have been romantic as all hell. I also thought it was important to make it at least a little bit memorable, something that could be shared with anybody who might ask. I really didn't think over dinner would cut it nor would trying to be super extravagant and intimate. I knew it had to be some kind of funny, some kind of public (because she wouldn't have expected that, and it had to be some kind of out-of-the-way from where it's usually done. She would have been on the lookout and, once that happened, she would have been very disappointed if she knew what to expect right away. Nope, she couldn't see it coming. Otherwise it wouldn't have worked.

And I think this would have worked.

Yours Swimmingly,
mojo shivers